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Everyone Always Wants to Know What Happened

Updated: Feb 26, 2021

It wasn't a single thing. There was an event, but that's just what ended it. It's been a developing awareness, over years now, that I drink a lot. I know I must drink a lot because I lie about how much drink. There are points over that time that I remember, and these are all what happened:

The Beginning

My first drink at home with my parents (red wine diluted with water, 11 yrs old)

My first cigarette (13 yrs old upstairs at the back of the school bus)

Stealing alcohol from Father's drinks cabinet. (13yrs old - 17yrs old)

My first joint (14 yrs old)

My first illegal drink from the offy (15 yrs old - a small hip flask of whisky, drank all of it one evening alone)

My first illegal drink over the bar (16 yrs old 3 Pints of bitter)

My college drinking reputation (I could drink anyone under the table and still walk home)

The first time I finished a whole bottle of whiskey in one night with one other person.

The Middle

Ordinary heavy drinking - nothing too embarrassing, regular Friday evening pints, Saturday nights wine, 5-7 pints every Sunday, occasional week day lunch time pints at work, (until mid-thirties)

Every now and then waking up with a migrain, vomiting and sweating all day, after a heavy drinking session. Concluded I was a little bit allergic to alcohol and resolved to not drink that heavily again.

The Beginning of the end

Being sick out of a friends velux attic window and him stepping over me to wash it all off the roof and guttering in the morning.

"Beer for Breakfast" whenever on holiday, day time drinking is cool and desirable. Planning holidays away around pubs that are walking distance.

Being sick at my parents in law house while all her relatives were there, and having pint with lunch the next day.

Lying on my bed curled up in the foetal position retching with nausea while listening to a happy gathering of friends downstairs, in the afternoon, because I'd drunk too much the night before.

Being too drunk to stand up in Barcelona

Waking up in a doorway freezing cold at 4am half way from town to my house.

Continuing to drink heavily while on anti-depressants

The Ends

Visiting with my Mum the day after my 52nd birthday. I was so hungover I was sick in the toilets at the cafe they had taken me to for lunch. Then throwing up 15 times at her house, long into the evening, while the delicious meal she had prepared for me went dry and Mum sat downstairs on her own.

Falling over in the back room and ripped a shelf off the wall as I fell

Being sick all over my mother-in-laws toilet without noticing the lid was down

Falling over backwards cos the chair I thought was there wasn't there and breaking a vase with my back, 10 days after a full hip replacement

Falling over in the snow and breaking my foot 8 weeks after a full hip replacement.

That was last Thursday

This is following Thursday. The Beginning

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